


The Weight of Your Words

by Tatjana_Fantasy



Category: The Age of Darkness series - Katy Rose Pool
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Book 1: There Will Come a Darkness, Confessions, Denial, Drama, Drowning, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Imprisonment, Judeton, LGBTQ Character, M/M, Mostly Canon Compliant, Snapshots, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-22 02:01:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30031326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tatjana_Fantasy/pseuds/Tatjana_Fantasy
Summary: Jude thinks his words are ridiculous.Anton would've died without his.
Relationships: Anton Aliyev/Jude Weatherbourne
Kudos: 2





	The Weight of Your Words

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! :)
> 
> So, in [Chapter 32 of my fan fiction “In Between the Darkness”](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28473342/chapters/71503395), I mentioned the famous AU where the first words two destined people say to each other reveal them soulmates. Even back then, I knew I wanted to write a Soulmate AU with Jude and Anton, which ended up being this “important words” AU. And I'm honestly super proud of it, so I hope you like it as well!
> 
> Have fun! :)

The Weight of Your Words

Jude thinks his words are ridiculous.

He still remembers the day he got them, the day the sky lit up for the Last Prophet, when Jude was only two years old and didn't understand anything about what was going on.

He remembers the feeling, a warm tingle like someone was gently striking his arm. He immediately told his father about it, slightly worried despite the comfortable touch. And his father had looked at Jude with a proud glimmer in his eyes, he had smiled and said: “I'll tell you more about it when you're older. For now, you only need to know that it was the Last Prophet calling out to you.”

Jude didn't understand back then. He had looked at the words, but of course, he wasn't able to read them just yet.

Until now.

Now, at almost five years old, Jude is finally able to make them out, five words inscribed on his forearm, five ridiculous words that don't make any sense at all.

**_Oh, good. You're not dead._ **

He doesn't understand. By now, he knows how important the Last Prophet is, but he highly doubts that these are the words they will say to him on day. So, he consults his father again, asks him what the words actually mean.

“They're a bond,” his father explains. “A bond between lovers, or friends, or siblings, or any other relationship that is strong enough to transcend the regular ones we form each day. One day, your soulmate will speak those words – maybe they'll be the first ones they say, or the last, but usually, they are words said during an important moment.”

Jude opens his mouth and his father shakes his head. “Keep them to yourself,” he orders sternly. “Only your soulmate can see your words and only after they spoke them to you. It's important that you don't share them with anyone – otherwise, your bond might be broken before it even had the chance to form itself.”

Jude looks at his words again. “And you think the Last Prophet will say them?” he asks doubtfully.

“They appeared on the day they were born,” his father continues. “When you're the younger soulmate, the words appear on the day of your birth; but if you're the older, they appear on the day your soulmate is born. One day, you will be Keeper of the Word, Jude. You will protect the Last Prophet with all your heart and soul. The words are an unmistakable sign of your bond.” He smiles at Jude, proud and relieved, just like he did on the day Jude got his words.

Jude still isn't sure, but he keeps his doubts to himself. He hides the words under layers of clothing, not wanting to see them unless necessary.

They are stupid, he thinks. Isn't the Last Prophet supposed to be their only hope, their only way out, their only light in the dark? Basically a higher being, someone who is able to stop the Age of Darkness? Jude doesn't believe that someone like that would say such ridiculous words. He somehow knows that they will be said in a casual tone, like his possible death barely means anything to the person worrying about it. Someone like the Prophet wouldn't think like that.

Jude doesn't like the implications of his thoughts – the possibility of him bonding with someone who isn't the Last Prophet –, but not because he doesn't want to.

But because he would disappoint his father in a way that could never be undone.

~ ~ ~

Anton's words are his only comfort growing up.

Whenever Illya hurts him, abuses him, torments him, Anton looks down at his words and murmurs them again and again, quietly enough to not be heard by anyone but himself. He says them before falling asleep and after waking up, whenever he feels lonely and whenever he needs a friend.

**_Whatever happens, I'll protect you._ **

His only comfort. His only hope. A promise his soulmate will make to him one day, his only reason to keep fighting.

Anton thought about giving up more than once. But whenever he comes close, whenever one of Illya's attacks gets too far, he just looks at his words to find his inner strength.

He doesn't know who will say them, has no idea when they'll meet, but they are already the most important person in the world to him. He promises to thank them when the time comes, with hugs or with kisses, whatever they'll prefer. Either way, Anton loves them with all his heart and soul. And he hopes his soulmate will love him the same way, too.

~

Anton sees the end of the world and wants to die.

He approaches the lake, step by step, not bothered by the cold and snow. The only thing he feels is this endless despair inside his heart. A despair so big that it makes him forget anything else.

He hears his brother's voice, his muffled footsteps, but he ignores him and walks towards the center of the lake. The ice cracks under his weight, but it's a welcoming sound, a sound that will make the images in his head disappear.

Then, Illya catches up to him.

Anton doesn't remember what happened after that – did he fell or did Illya push him? –, but suddenly, he's surrounded by dark, cold water and cannot breathe.

It's so cold that his mind freezes. So cold that everything else in his life stops existing. Anton is drowning, drowning, drowning, without a chance of ever reaching the surface.

Until he glances at his arm. Until he remembers. He can't actually read the words underwater, but he will always know what they say.

**_Whatever happens, I'll protect you._ **

Anton breaks through the water's surface.

~

He flees.

Almost dies.

(Multiple times.)

He loses parts of himself, parts he thought were untouchable.

Apart from one thing: The words. The words help him keep going, no matter how bad his situation gets. Anton learns to smile again. To _live_ again. He makes a decision.

He needs to flee from Illya, but he also needs to find his soulmate.

~ ~ ~

When Jude meets Hector for the first time, his heart skips a beat. Immediately, he takes everything back, every nasty thought he ever had about his words. They aren't ridiculous, but an amazing way to tell him that he's bonded to someone else.

Not to the Prophet. But to Hector.

Jude knows it isn't allowed. The Paladin have a sacred oath, an oath that forbids any feelings that might distract them from what is their only purpose: The Last Prophet. So he shoves his hopes aside, locks them in the back of his mind and throws away the key.

Still, he forms a friendship with Hector. And hopes every single day that he'll say the words, the words that will change Jude's life forever.

He never does. Even after Jude fully realizes what Hector means to him, he never utters the five words written on his forearm. But Jude doesn't stop believing. Whenever he starts to doubt himself, he looks at his words.

**_Oh, good. You're not dead._ **

It sounds like something Hector would say, maybe after one of their “little adventures”, as he calls them. The words imply that something went wrong – albeit not as wrong to be really worried about him – and Jude soon catches himself making unnecessary mistakes whenever he is alone with Hector. It's not until his friend calls him out that Jude realizes how stupid he acts. He stops and waits for the words to be spoken naturally.

But Hector never says them.

~ ~ ~

The strange _esha_ washes through him like a storm and Anton immediately knows: This is it. They are here. His soulmate arrived in Pallas Athos.

There can be no misunderstanding. Anton never felt such a powerful _esha_ before, never felt this sudden urge to follow one, like flowers following the way of the sun, like waves following the gravitational pull of the moon.

And yet, he doesn't do anything.

Because this _esha_ also feels like drowning, like Illya pushing his head underwater, without a way to defend himself. Anton can barely breathe, he shakes and he shudders, he is afraid.

But he knows he has to find them. Whomever they are, they will say the words that comforted Anton during his most desperate moments. Anton waited for them for such a long time and he won't run away just because his brother looms in his mind. _Not this time._

He starts to run, but he is too late. The _esha_ disappears and Anton can't tell where it is anymore. Whoever it was, they are gone, left this part of the city. He missed his chance.

Anton clenches his fist and makes a promise to himself: He will not hesitate next time.

_If there even is a next time._

There has to be. There will be.

Because this person, his soulmate, is everything Anton ever longed for. Fate will bring them together again.

~ ~ ~

The Last Prophet has been found and Jude was never more afraid to meet him.

His body trembles and Jude can't control the conflicting thoughts and feelings that battle inside his mind.

He is the Keeper of the Word, he is supposed to protect the Last Prophet at any cost. Prince Hassan and him are bonded together by fate, nothing will ever change that. Not his heart, not his will and certainly not his words.

Jude is so, so afraid that Prince Hassan will say them. It doesn't make any sense, but that doesn't stop Jude from dreading it. If Prince Hassan says them, all of Jude's hopes are crushed. He wants Hector as his soulmate, even if he will never be able to show him his true feelings.

But it isn't his choice. It never was. The words will be spoken, whether Jude likes it or not. Of course, he could tell them someone else, he could break the bond, but those stupid thoughts are nothing more than this: stupid thoughts. Jude would never risk losing his words this way.

He takes a deep breath. Then, he leads the Paladin to their destination.

Sooner than he'd liked, he stands in front of Prince Hassan. His only purpose, his true north, his soulmate. The person Jude had been waiting for for such a long time.

And he doesn't feel anything.

~ ~ ~

Fate brings them together again.

Anton's Grace meets the swordsman's _esha_ and his whole world shifts. He cannot breathe. He cannot look away. And he cannot stop his own feelings from overflowing his heart and overwhelming his soul.

It's him. The swordsman. The person who saved his life.

But before Anton can do anything, before he can even open his mouth, the swordsman looks away and follows the other Paladin.

Something in Anton cracks.

This isn't right. He looks at his words.

**_Whatever happens, I'll protect you._ **

They sound like a lie.

~ ~ ~

Hector got lost on his path and only Jude can show him the way back.

He just has to find the right words.

Literally.

If Hector is his soulmate – and Jude doesn't believe anything else –, Jude is also his. Which means something he will say is written on Hector's arm, something that will convince him to return to the Order, to the Paladin, to Jude.

He has to find them. Hector's words. The only words powerful enough to change his destiny.

“You swore an oath to _me_.”

“I _chose_ you.”

“I _can't_.”

It doesn't work. They're the wrong words. They're not the words Hector had been waiting for his whole life.

The ground shifts.

Jude falls.

He hears Hector's voice, calling out his name.

Then, everything turns black.

~

Freckles.

That's the first thing Jude sees. Beautiful freckles on a pale, unfamiliar face. He hears a relieving sigh.

“Oh, good. You're not dead.”

Jude winces so hard that pain drives through his wounded shoulder. His right arm feels like someone stroke it gently, a comfortable feeling Jude almost forgot. And it feels entirely wrong. Unbelievably, he stares at the boy in front of him.

He said the words. And he not only said them, his words clearly recognized him as his soulmate.

This had to be a mistake. There's no way this stranger – the other prisoner, Jude realizes – is his _soulmate_. Maybe he is still dreaming. Maybe Hector's betrayal shocked him so much that he's now imagining things. Yes, that is the only explanation.

Something like disappointment creeps into the boy's features. He looks like he's about to say something, but doesn't.

Jude hesitates. Then, he asks the boy about Hector.

~ ~ ~

“Hector, he – Where did he –?”

Anton stiffens. “He's gone,” he says coldly, not able to hide the utter disappointment in his voice.

This is his soulmate. His _esha_ is an unmistakable sign. This is the one who'll say the words, the person Anton owes his life to.

And yet, his soulmate doesn't care about him at all.

Anton grits his teeth. But honestly, what did he expect? That his soulmate would immediately promise to protect him, like his words suggest? Of course it wouldn't be that easy. But he's still so, so disappointed.

The Paladin – _Jude_ , Anton remembers – only cares about the other one, the one who just betrayed him. It's an irrational feeling, but then again, who is he to talk? _He_ put so much meaning into their first meeting, not Jude. Anton didn't even consider the possibility that it might not go well. In his mind, they immediately recognized each other – and to be fair, Jude's _esha_ _does_ feel somehow familiar –, Anton hugged him and whispered a “Thank you” while tears ran down his cheeks.

But that was just the dream of a foolish boy, someone Anton should've abandoned a long time ago.

And yet – he can't. He can't. He wants to give Jude a chance, no matter how far-fetched his dreams are. If he is his soulmate, he deserves it. And if he somehow isn't, Anton still needs to find out why his Grace called out to him.

So he stays. Takes Jude outside. Buys him dessert.

And smiles when Jude eats it like he never ate sweet food before.

Maybe Jude is the right person after all.

~ ~ ~

Maybe Anton is the right person after all.

Jude hates himself for thinking this – he stole the Pinnacle Blade, for crying out loud! –, but he can't help but warm up to the boy with every passing minute. Because yes, Anton stole his sword. Yes, he bet it on a card game. Yes, he made a stupid choice by risking its loss.

But –

But –

He won it back. He saved Jude's life. He gave him a ticket to Hector. And he stares at him in a way that makes Jude's whole body shiver.

Not currently, though. Currently, Anton's busy with getting drunk, which finally gives Jude an opportunity to look at his words without worrying about anything else.

_“Does anything happen with the words after they are said?” he asks his father. “How do I know for sure that the person who says them is actually my soulmate and didn't say the words by chance?”_

_“You will know,” his father replies. “You will feel it. But, if you really want to make sure – after they are said, the words will turn gold.”_

They are gold. The original black letters were replaced by golden ones, a nice contrast to Jude's tawny skin.

Anton really is his soulmate.

A part of him still can't believe it – a part of him _refuses_ to believe it –, but now that the first shock had faded, Jude feels more comfortable with the thought.

Maybe Anton is his soulmate because he will help him find Hector. It's a possibility. Still unusual for a soulmate bond, but not impossible. Either way, Jude can live with it. Anton will never be Hector, but he is a lot more sympathetic than the Last Prophet. His first meeting with Prince Hassan left a bad taste in Jude's mouth; he will never forget how … _normal_ he felt after meeting the person who was supposed to be his only purpose.

Anton makes him feel much, much better. Maybe _too_ good, he realizes. Jude likes to look at him, although he would never admit it. And, even stranger, he likes it when Anton looks at _him_.

He can't quite explain it, but something in Anton – and it's certainly not his words – warms Jude, like a blanket on a cold winter night, like the sun on a warm summer day.

He wants to learn more about him.

~ ~ ~

Footsteps.

Illya's _esha_.

Fear rises in Anton's chest, poisons his blood and makes it impossible to breathe. He looks at Jude in desperation, doesn't know what to do. Every thought vanishes with the threat of Illya.

“Go out the window,” Jude says determined. “I'll hold them here and find you after.”

He looks in Jude's eyes and nods. He believes him. He's his soulmate.

Still, he can barely move. He is so afraid. Illya is there, he will find him. Anton knows this. There's no way out, there never was. He had been telling himself a lie. Nothing will stop Illya, not even someone as powerful as Jude.

He looks at him again. He doesn't want to leave him.

Jude returns his gaze. “Whatever happens,” he says, “I'll protect you.”

Anton freezes.

The words. Jude said them. Anton knew he would, but now that it happened, he can't believe it. But not because Jude is officially his soulmate now.

But because he _isn't_.

The words surprised Anton because they are also embedded on his arm, but that's all. He knows how he's supposed to feel now. He asked a lot of people about it and they all said the same: “It feels like someone gently touches your arm.” “Basically a very comfortable, warm caress.” “Oh, and the words turn gold afterwards!”

None on this applies to him now. His arm still feels cold. Anton doesn't feel any different. To make sure, he pulls his sleeve up. He doesn't really want to know and they don't have time anyway, but he needs to do it before he loses his chance.

Anton's heart skips a beat. Everything else stops existing, there are just him and his words.

They are still black.

Jude is not his soulmate.

~ ~ ~

Jude is trapped in the darkness and his whole body hurts.

The chains forged in Godfire do their job. They block his _esha_ , they make him feel empty. It feels like he lost his soul. Maybe he did, Jude doesn't know. He only knows one thing: He failed. He failed everyone. Hector, the other Paladin, the Prophet, Anton.

Anton.

He looks at him. They talked for a bit, but soon stopped because all topics reminded them of their failures. Either way, Anton seems strangely distant and barely looks Jude in the eyes.

Jude glances at his arm and swallows. In the dark, he can't see them, but he knows the golden words are there.

**_Oh, good. You're not dead._ **

He almost laughs. _I will be soon._

He still thinks the words are ridiculous, but in a good way. An Anton way. He looks at him again, hesitates.

Anton doesn't know. Jude didn't tell him. But now that Jude's death seems inevitable, he feels it's his duty to tell him, before it's too late.

“Anton –”

Anton looks up, but he avoids Jude's gaze. He looks so … defeated. Hopeless. Like he'd given up. “What is it?” he asks quietly.

The distance is still there and makes it impossible to find the right words. Anton sounds so … disappointed. Jude can't blame him. He broke his promise, he didn't protect him. He failed everyone, including himself.

So, instead of telling Anton the truth, Jude says: “I'm sorry.”

They're an echo of the words Anton said before, and Anton answers the same way he did.

“Don't.”

Jude simply nods. He honestly didn't expect anything else. Still, a significant part of him thinks that he could've avoided all of this if he had followed the Order from the very beginning.

Thinking about them hurts. Jude betrayed them, so even if he somehow gets out of this alive, he will be executed for following his heart. And he will accept his punishment because he doesn't deserve anything less.

He closes his eyes. Maybe it's better to keep his bond with Anton a secret. Not only would his father completely freak out, but Anton himself would feel obligated to save him after knowing his words are on Jude's arm.

This solidifies his decision.

He will not tell him.

~ ~ ~

Illya takes him away.

Anton doesn't defend himself. He knows it's fruitless. If he doesn't obey Illya, he will kill Jude. Or worse, burn out his Grace. So Anton complies and prepares to die for Jude's freedom instead.

Illya takes him to an underground lake. Anton's heart stutters. He knows what will happen, but his mind refuses to accept it.

Illya will drown him.

Fear flashes through him like lightning, strikes him with full force and makes him stop dead in his tracks.

“ _No_ ,” he breathes.

Illya smiles. “It's you or him,” he says like it's a choice. It's obviously a lie. Illya will kill him regardless. This is just a test.

He looks directly in Illya's eyes.

“Do what you want with me, but leave him alone.”

Illya's smile brightens. “That's exactly what I wanted to hear.”

And his henchmen grab him, drag him to the lake – and put his head underwater. Anton gasps, water flows in his lungs and he coughs the second he breathes air again.

It doesn't last long.

They drown him again. And again. And again.

And Anton hears Illya's voice in his head, like a gentle whisper in his ear:

_“You are the Last Prophet, Anton. You know that, right?”_

_“Tell me your words, Anton. Let me speak them to you. Let us form the bond.”_

_“Tell me what you saw that day, Anton. Tell me what made you want to die so badly.”_

But Anton doesn't remember. He doesn't want to remember.

Illya doesn't give him a choice, though. Every second he's surrounded by water brings him closer to the truth, closer to the horrible memory he locked away so long ago.

He needs help.

Jude's help.

He is not his soulmate, but Anton doesn't care. He chooses him anyway.

No one ever made him feel safe. No one ever promised to protect him. No one's _esha_ ever called out so strongly to his Grace before.

His real soulmate obviously doesn't care about him. Otherwise, they would've saved him already. So, Anton calls out to Jude instead. He will come. Anton trusts him. He will come and save Anton from this nightmare. Anton doesn't need his real soulmate.

He just needs Jude.

~ ~ ~

Jude's words burn with the power of another Grace. Despite his dire situation, he risks a look.

The words flicker between gold and silver, gold and silver, gold and silver –

His eyes widen.

_Anton._

Anton is in danger.

Jude's focus shifts. He forgets the Hierophant, the Witnesses, the Godfire. He even forgets the Last Prophet. A new purpose forms in his mind, overflows his heart and overwhelms his soul.

He needs to save Anton.

He _will_ save Anton.

No matter what happens to himself.

~ ~ ~

Jude comes.

He looks at him like Anton's the most important thing in his world.

“It's _you_ ,” he says and Anton wants to kiss him. He doesn't fully understand what Jude means, but he doesn't need to. He is here. That's all that matters. Screw his real soulmate, Anton chooses Jude.

Illya comes and Jude overwhelms him quickly. “You are never going to hurt him again,” he hisses and Anton hears the threat in his voice. He not only wants to kiss him. He _will_ kiss him after all of this is over.

But it's not over yet. Illya is still there and his voice makes Anton shiver more than the cold water. His brother makes a valid point: Anton can't run away from the truth. The Order wants the same thing as Illya, they will uncover his vision whether Anton likes it or not.

He looks at Jude with uncertainty. He trusts him, he believes him, but he neither trusts nor believes the Order. But he knows Jude does. Which choice will he make? What's more important to him? _Who's_ more important to him?

A small smile forms on Jude's lips. “Whatever happens,” he says, “I'll protect you.”

Anton gasps as a warm feeling spreads through his arm. He looks down, he can't help himself. Despite the tense situation, despite the fact that there are more important matters to deal with, he has to know.

His words are golden.

His soulmate is Jude.

Jude is his soulmate.

And everything falls into place. Jude had said the words in the tavern, but they didn't trigger their bond. Now, he knows why. Anton hadn't been ready yet. Jude hadn't been ready yet. Anton had wanted Jude as his soulmate, but neither of them had realized their true purpose back then. Now, they did. Anton had chosen Jude even after believing that he wasn't his soulmate. And Jude had heard his cry for help and answered it without knowing that the Last Prophet awaited him.

They were soulmates because they had chosen each other despite everything that tried to break them apart.

“You can't run from this, Anton,” Illya says. “Not anymore.”

He's right. But Anton doesn't need to run away anymore.

Because he found someone he wanted to stay with.

~

They fall –

– through the air –

– through the fire –

– into the water –

– his vision –

– the end of the world –

~

The first thing Anton does after waking up is looking at his words. They burn painfully, like the Godfire that burned Jude. He swallows when he sees that they flicker between gold and silver, between life and death. He heard about it before, but actually seeing it is something else entirely.

Jude is on the brink of death and it's all his fault.

His looming vision had manipulated him, had brought him to the Godfire and Anton had listened to it despite the comfort of having the golden words on his arm.

And that had almost cost Jude's life.

Certainly his Grace.

And maybe even … his words.

Anton swallows. He feels dizzy. But that doesn't matter.

He needs to see Jude.

~

He sees Jude.

He hates himself for the relief he feels after seeing his unharmed right arm, golden words on golden skin. Jude didn't show him his words and Anton doesn't know what they are, but the color confirms he already said them. He also knows that only he and Jude can see them, the words that bonded them together after almost seventeen years.

Then his gaze shifts, he forces himself to look at the rest of Jude's body, at –

– his scars, like shattered glass –

– and immediately looks away. He can't. He won't. He did this to him. It doesn't matter if the words are intact, Anton broke their bond anyway. He doesn't deserve Jude.

He runs away.

~

Jude catches up to him eights days later.

Anton stands on the railing of the ship and seriously thinks about jumping off. Of course, he doesn't, but only for the moment. Only because Jude is by his side. And maybe also because Anton doesn't actually want to die.

“You're awake,” Anton says.

“So are you,” Jude responds.

That breaks the ice between them. They said these words before, they just switched places now. Anton looks at him, turns his gaze away from Jude's scars and focuses solely on his lips. He still wants to kiss him.

“I need to tell you something,” Jude says.

Anton blinks. He is tempted to make a joke, just so he won't have to hear what Jude has to say, but in the end, he simply nods and listens.

Only that Jude doesn't say anything. He looks at Anton with hesitation, almost fear, like he's afraid of his reaction. Anton waits, gives him the time he needs. Finally, Jude takes a deep breath, looks directly in his eyes and pulls his sleeve up.

Anton sees his words.

**_Oh, good. You're not dead._ **

For a few endless seconds, he simply stares at them, not quite realizing what they mean. Then, he remembers. Their first meeting. When Anton's Grace called out to Jude's _esha_. The moment Anton finally knew he wouldn't be alone anymore.

A laugh escapes his lips. “I can't believe that out of all the dumb things I said, _these_ words made it onto your arm. It's kinda ridiculous, isn't it?”

“That was my first thought as well,” Jude admits and his cheeks redden. “But now I think they fit very well.”

Anton avoids his gaze, looks at the words again. He's glad that Jude isn't dead, but would _he_ really call his current state an improvement? Anton isn't sure and he's too afraid to ask.

“Anton?”

Automatically, Anton raises his head, meets Jude's green gaze.

Jude swallows. “You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, but …” Instead of finishing the sentence, he looks at Anton's arm. Anton understands.

It's both the easiest and hardest decision he ever made.

~ ~ ~

“Before you see them,” Anton says, “you need to understand how important they really were to me.”

Jude looks at him, but Anton doesn't return his gaze. Instead, he looks at the ocean, like he wants to drown in it. Jude tenses. He doesn't like that look. Without thinking, he lays his hand on Anton's.

“Don't,” Anton pleads and the word hurts more than the Godfire that burned out Jude's Grace. He immediately lowers his hand.

“They saved me from drowning,” Anton continues as if Jude hadn't done anything. “They saved me multiple times. My brother … what you saw back there was just a sliver of his true self. He's cruel, Jude. And he enjoys being cruel. Especially when he can be cruel to me.”

Jude listens, but he already promises himself to make Illya pay for everything he did to Anton.

“Whenever Illya … hurt me,” Anton continues more hesitantly, “my words were my only comfort, the only thing that kept me from giving up. Without them, I would've died a long time ago. I … I relied so much on them, I gave so much meaning to them … they saved my life. They saved _me_. I want you to understand this before I show them to you.”

Jude doesn't know what to say. He doesn't even know if he wants to see Anton's words anymore. Maybe it is enough to know how important they were to him. Maybe he doesn't actually need to know what they are.

But …

He wants to know. He wants to know which words were powerful enough to make Anton endure painful day after painful day, painful year after painful year. What could he possibly have said to help him? Jude can't think of anything.

“I understand,” he says quietly. “Do you want to show them to me?” _The words that bonded our fates together?_

Anton nods. Slowly, he pulls his sleeve up. He smiles reassuringly, but Jude isn't convinced it's completely genuine. Did Anton really return to his former self, the boy who had saved Jude's life before speaking the words that changed his world forever? Or is this smile just a mask in order to hide his true feelings? Jude can't tell, but either way, he finally reads the words that helped Anton to get this far.

**_Whatever happens, I'll protect you._ **

He looks up, gets lost in Anton's dark eyes. Jude spoke these words twice; before he knew who Anton really was and after he realized who he was always meant to be.

“When did they turn gold?” he asks. Anton's answer will determine Jude's future.

Anton shakes his head. “I'm not telling you.” He pulls the sleeve back down.

“Why?” Jude asks, slightly offended.

Anton's smile cracks a little bit. He's like a language Jude can't quite understand. Sometimes, he's almost able to read it – read _him_ – and sometimes, it's like he forgot how to read at all.

“Because,” Anton says, “it doesn't matter. Even before you said them, even before I met you, you were the most important person in the world to me.”

Jude looks at him, stunned. He didn't expect such a genuine answer. He doesn't know what to say, so he just looks at Anton, waiting for him to make the first move.

Anton stretches out his hand. At first, Jude doesn't understand, but then he takes it, intertwines their fingers, their fates. A silent vow, somehow even heavier than the weight of their words.

Jude doesn't know what awaits them now, which challenges they have to overcome, but there's one thing he knows for certain: He will face them together with Anton.

Not because they are bonded by words. Not because Anton is the Prophet and Jude is the Keeper of the Word.

But because right here and right now, Jude chooses this destiny for himself.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! It means a lot to me. <3
> 
> My next Age of Darkness fanfiction, a small, not-too-serious Judeton one-shot called “Graveyard Confessions”, will be uploaded next Sunday on March 21st, so keep your eyes open ;D


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